K.W. 發問於 社會及文化語言 · 1 十年前

幫忙改英文grammer,20點

Let me try to exploit my knowledge and eagerness to protect our environment, health and the future. When I studying in secondary school, the presentation of environmental, occupational safety and health problems in the media was what initially sparked my interest and attention in environmental studies. So, there was never any scruple that I would pick Environmental Science when I study in IVE. I regret to hear of my countryman’s died from mine disaster, plumbism, pneumoconiosis, water pollution etc what related to man-made calamity and unscrupulous people violate the legislation. I hope my knowledge, effort and enthusiasm are a virtual help, to reduce these serious harm to the environment and people's safety and health.

I feel that this course will satisfy my curiosity about the world around us, and hope it will lead me to a career that aims to find ways to protect the environment and create safe and healthy occupational surroundings.During the life in IVE, I learn to hard study with research by myself as I known that teacher’s notes and lectures are an important enlightenment and direction. Research may be use much more time, but it is help with learning much more and continued learning. My final year project is about green roof’s capacity and effectiveness in environmental protection performance with central way of research and monitoring. During the process of research and monitoring, I learn much more knowledge about plant performance, carbon sequestration, nutrients of soil detection and etc which are not study in teacher’s notes.I have seized opportunity to get involved with extra-curricular activities which are to assist me broaden my horizons. In this summer holiday, I visited the Shang Ha EXPO and experienced the theme-Better city better life. I discovered many ideas, technology related to environmental protection and eco-friendly life style such as concept vehicles. In my opinion, achieve the ideas is not the most important.

更新:

The most important aim is educate people to take action in eco-friendly life style.

2 個解答

評分
  • 1 十年前
    最愛解答

    Firstly, let me just express my eagerness and consideration of protecting our environment, health and the future.

    When I was studying in secondary school, news which was about environmental, occupational safety and health problems in the media, stimulated my interest and attention in environmental studies. So, I did not have any hesitation while I picked subject of Environmental Science in IVE. Sadly, I heard that my countryman’s was died of “mining disasters”, plumbism, pneumoconiosis, water pollutions etc. These lamented issues appeared frequently were because of the human who has violated the law. I hope I can reduce these sorrowful incidents by applying my knowledge and power.

    I think that this course will provide as much answers as possible to satisfy our curiosities about the nature. I wish I can be an environmentalist who is keen on searching for ways to safeguard the environment and building up a healthy home for human. .

    During my study journey in IVE, I worked hard with research projects.. Besides, I also understood that teacher’s notes and lectures acting as an enlightenment and bright light for our studies. Truly speaking, research was a time-consuming task, however I can gain more when paid more effort into it. In the final year of study, I had a project which was about green roof’s capacity and the effectiveness in environmental protection performance with central way of research and monitoring. During the process of research and monitoring, I obtained a lot of knowledge about performances conducted in plants, , carbon sequestration, nutrition of soil detection etc in which were not the main stream of this course.

    2011-01-24 17:24:37 補充:

    I treasured extra-curricular activities and they can enable to broaden my horizon. In this summer holiday, I visited the Shang Ha EXPO and experienced the theme-Better city better life. In addition,

    2011-01-24 17:25:49 補充:

    (for the last part, please see 意見 as it excesses the word limits.

    2011-01-24 17:27:06 補充:

    I discovered many ideas for example technology related to environmental protection and eco-friendly life style such as the concept of vehicle and so on, but personally I don't think these ideas will benefit much on environmental protection.

    2011-01-24 17:27:15 補充:

    Last, our mission of doing this research is to raise the awareness of conserving our environment and take action on establishing an environmental life style.

    2011-01-25 19:34:52 補充:

    Some comment for your writing:

    First, please proofread your work before submission. Second, there are a lot of grammatical mistakes that should not appear in your writing while you completed secondary education long time ago, however they occurs apparantly. TO BE CONTINUE......

    2011-01-25 19:35:26 補充:

    Third, if your English ability is not good enough to handle complex structure form of sentences, you are adviced to write in simple form of sentences as a start, otherwise, readers are difficult to understand what you want to say.

    TO BE CONTINUE......

    2011-01-25 19:35:39 補充:

    (句式複雜兼且函蓋了太多事物,同時英語表達能力又未能駕馭得到,造成文章意思未明。此外,小心運用每一個字詞,近義詞也要清楚了解其意思,並細看相關的例句,還要避免過於咬文嚼字,否則便會出現矯揉造作之象了,所以你的作文句子有run on sentence, fragment, awkward 等等的問題)

    資料來源: My own English language skills
  • 1 十年前

    要點做?我唔明呀!!!

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