Emma 發問於 社會及文化語言 · 1 十年 前

有冇錯呀~~please!!!

Two day ago, the cruel chimney sweep, Mr Fry took his apprentice to visit Mrs Hutton, and his apprentice was Will. When I saw Will, I felt astonished because he was too shinny, and I know that Mr Fry was harsh to Will surely. Then Will told us about his experience. He told us that his father sold him for Mr Fry, and he believe that fathers were all the same.

2 個解答

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  • ?
    Lv 7
    1 十年 前
    最佳解答

    只改文法如下:(全面用過去式)

    Two day(s) ago, the cruel chimney sweep(swept), Mr Fry took his apprentice to visit Mrs Hutton, and his apprentice was Will. When I saw Will, I felt astonished because he was too shinny, and I know(knew) that Mr Fry was harsh(ed) to Will surely. Then Will told us about his experience. He told us that his father sold him for(to) Mr Fry, and he believe(d) that fathers were all the same.

    如若連內容結構都改,全文將會面目全非。

    2007-03-08 00:00:13 補充:

    原文有很多不通之地方

    資料來源: My personal English usage and daily contacts with foreigners over 39 years
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  • 1 十年 前

    Please note, You are not only have to change the tenses, but also the another grammar mistakes like, the way you have structured the sentences, punctuation etc.

    Here's my version, hope you can spot the differences.

    Two days ago, the cruelty chimney sweeper, Mr Fry visited Mrs Hutton with his apprentice, Will. When I saw Will, I was astonished at how weak and skinny he was.

    I knew he’d been treated harshly by Mr Fry. Then Will told us about his story and how his father had sold him to Mr Fry. Will believed that every father in the world is just the same.

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